Who could have imagined that in a state with the enlightened history of being the birthplace of the Ku Klux Klan would become such a place of intolerance?
In a surprise to no one without a bug up their ass, among other things, about homosexuality, some people have decided that gay marriage is still a little too much for them to swallow. In a state with no Italians, local flavorless Indiana pizza shop, the subtley-named “Fuck Gay People Pizza” ignited a flaming controversy when they refused to construct the company’s first semen-topping pizzas for a gay wedding. They’re like “God Hates Fags” with pepperonis. They must not have gotten the memo that the Gay mafia rules this country with an iron fist up their ass. Refusing gay people? Who do these pieholes think they are, the military?
Immediately adding to the controversy was Indiana governor Larry Bird (I’m just guessing) when he signed the hick state’s new RFRA act, which stands for “Really Fags? Really? Again?” This charming piece of legislative bigotry extends the right for homophobic religious fanatics to legally discriminate people that their book of ancient fairy tales and imaginary friend in the sky claims are a little too nutty. All the extra media presence in Indy for the Final Four has only served to further highlight the rampaging idiocy gripping the Hoosier state. Even more ironic is that if Duke wins, the gayest school in the country would be the champions. Then maybe Krzyzewski can take the Blew Devils for a lovely postgame pizza party at “Fuck Gay People Pizza” for some delicious loogies with cheese.